Practices of Self-Regulation and Self-Destruction

Until 2013, atypical sexual behavior, which includes such patterns as “games” with the role model of dominance and submission; taking control of one's partner and giving him or her control over oneself; “games” with restriction of the partner's movement, “games” with elements of punishment and reward, as well as “games” with pain stimulation, were considered paraphilias, which were attributed to sadistic and masochistic personality disorder [Connolly, 2006]. And only since 2013 in the American Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders of the fifth edition began to separate the concepts of pathological sexual deviation and masochistic or sadistic sexual interest. If a person does not harm himself or others, and does not commit acts against the will of his sexual partner and others, and the aforementioned sexual interests do not limit his development in other areas of life, then sadistic and masochistic sexual disorders cannot be diagnosed [American Psychiatric Association, 2013]. The International Classification of Diseases also confirms the above-mentioned separation, and sadomasochistic practices that are consensual and non-harmful are no longer categorized as a sexual disorder. Thus, the above-mentioned sexual patterns today can be classified as non-taboo practices, provided that they do not cause harm to the participants, do not affect other spheres of human life in a negative way, and are performed strictly by mutual consent of the partners. Then the question arises as to how modern psychologists and psychotherapists should deal with these patterns in practice. If earlier this atypical sexual behavior as a pathology was subjected to justified criticism of specialists, at the present moment it is necessary to find an optimal way to take into account in the process of therapy and take into account both masochistic and sadistic patterns of sexual behavior of individuals, as they can be connected with other patterns of non-erotic character within the mental structure of a person. However, it is important to no longer criticize them, but rather to advocate for their acceptance when a psychiatrist confirms that there is insufficient evidence for a diagnosis. Currently, many researchers and practitioners from the field of sexology and psychotherapy are studying the phenomenon of such atypical sexual behaviors, which include such patterns as “games” with the role model of dominance and submission; taking control over one's partner and giving him/her control over oneself; “games” with restriction of the partner's movement, “games” with elements of punishment and reward, as well as “games” with pain stimulation, in order to integrate the sexual sphere of a person's life into the therapeutic process for the holistic development of the person within the mental health system. The purpose of this paper is to investigate the effects of self-regulation of personality and the risk of self-destruction in the context of such non-abusive sexual practices as “games” with the role model of dominance and submission; taking control over one's partner and giving him/her control over oneself; “games” with restriction of partner's movement, “games” with elements of punishment and reward, as well as “games” with pain stimulation. The paper considered such preconditions for the manifestation of craving for the above practices as emotional, physical and sexualized violence, as well as verbal or unspoken prohibition of sexual life and condemnation of masturbation. Next, the possible consequences of all types of violence on the individual and an example of a scheme of their cure from the point of view of dialectical-behavioral therapy of M. Linehan were given.